Hi everyone! Welcome to the Reawakening Beauty blog.
My name is Shawna Patruno and I have a passion for helping people feel confident in their skin. The reason why I’m so passionate about this topic is because, I didn’t always feel confident in my skin and this is a journey I’m still on, I’m not going say I’m 100% but I’m working on it daily. My background is in beauty and also I have a history of modeling. Some of the brands that I modeled for were Kim Crawford, Cineplex, Kevin Murphy and I’ve also been in a movie, so that’s kind of cool. It was just a very small part, I actually got smacked, which sounds really funny, but it happened. Over the years I have been through a lot and have gained a lot of experience relating to confidence, going after your goals, what that looks like and what that can mean to you.
I remember getting into modeling, and having a friend say to me, “I didn’t know just anyone can model.” This really hurt me and I was like, Ouch! Reflecting back now I don’t think she really meant it the way it came out, like she’s honestly one of my favorite people and I love this girl. But at the time we were both just like starting to get into our confidence, so this comment really hurt. I debated things like, is she right or “Should I not be modeling?”. But as I thought more about it I was like, you know what, I’ve always wanted to do this, so I’m going do this and I’m not going to care what she thinks. Two years later, she messaged me and mentioned how proud of me she was and became so supportive, all because I stuck with it. People sometimes don’t support you in the beginning, but when they see you stick with something, they sometimes rise to the occasion, and can become proud and supportive of you. Talking with her afterwards she said, “You know, I always wanted to model but never started” and then she proceeded to ask for me to help her get into modeling and of course I was like, yeah, let’s totally do this. I realized that her earlier comments were coming from a place of insecurity, and I’ve noticed that a lot with people. I personally have a lot compassion and excitement for people. I’ve always been the type of person who is really excited, like genuinely excited for people to win in life. Insecurity for me is feeling like people sometimes don’t like me, that’s my insecurity. But it’s never been, “Oh my God, I don’t want you to shine brighter than me”. It’s been the complete opposite, it’s been like, “Oh my god, you’re so beautiful”. For example, I’m the type of person that goes up to the girl in the bathroom and says things like “You have such pretty eyes.” She’s probably thinking I’m hitting on her but in reality I just think she has pretty eyes or her winged eyeliner is really cute. These are the kind of things that I’m always doing so I never understood why others would tear another human being down. I just never understood that, and I still don’t understand it to this day. But I think when you become confident in yourself, you start to learn to just embrace yourself. It’s literally learning to love all the aspects of you including; the good, the bad, and the ugly, it’s not just bits and pieces, it’s everything! Sometimes shining your light so bright and going after your dreams is also showing others that they too can go after their dreams. Years later I realized my friend just wanted to model, but she felt she couldn’t she do this because she didn’t think she was pretty enough. So her words were just a projection of her pain and she was projecting on me what she felt she couldn’t do. The funny part is I was modelling, because I thought she was beautiful and so I was thinking why the hell are you not modeling! I was hoping that we would be able to model together, I thought that would be so much fun. But it was her insecurity and her thought about herself that stopped her.
I want everyone to know that you can do it, you can go after your dreams. 100% you can! You can do anything you put your mind to and focus on. I feel inspired to share what I believe would be helpful to somebody else who may be at the starting point where I started many years ago. So, I hope this was helpful, and whether you get the outcome you’re wanting or whether people support you or not, just surround yourself with positivity. Whether you have to watch YouTube videos or listen to podcasts or like me listen to audiobooks, just do whatever you need to do to keep going after your goal. My mom used to say to me, “Don’t let the naysayers got you.” Which is so cute because it’s true! People are going to try and drag you down, but that’s because they feel insecure by you shining bright. My goal is that everybody would shine bright together, as cheesy as that sounds. So yeah, that’s my story on my confidence, and understanding why people say mean things and how that could impact you.
All right, I’m sending you so much love and I wish you all the best wherever you are in the world!